In early November, I found my inner dialogue anything but friendly. I had a serious case of not-enoughness that started off slowly but gained way too much momentum. I was on a call with my business mentor as I went own the rabbit hole of negative thinking... My business wasn't where I wanted it to be yet. My house isn't as organized or styled as I'd like it to be. My closet isn't as hip or conscious as I wanted it to be. My body wasn't as thin as I thought it should be...pretty much I wasn't good at anything, and this limited belief screamed "I am not enough". But, where does this self-deprecation come from?
"It is only when we compare ourselves to others that we find we are not enough."
Despite knowing that people only portray a very small fraction of their lives on their heavily curated social media feeds, the images and content still get to me. At first, the marketing major in me passes it off, knowing these are just scheduled campaigns. But over time, the feeds cause me to feel insecure, pressured, and lacking. So in effort to stop the game of constant comparison, I decided to embark on a social media detox for mental health. I deleted my instagram app the week before Thanksgiving and vowed not to scroll, post, or return to my feed until sometime in January. I also figured this would be a good time to ditch the screen time habits that took me away from being fully present with my little kiddos during the Holiday season.
So what happened? I can tell you, that almost instantly, my relationship with my super sensitive and fiery 4 year old shifted She felt heard. She felt important. She wasn't competing for my attention with a device. Mostly, she felt my presence.
Two weeks into the detox, I found myself overflowing with new creative ideas and the energy to actually commit to some of them. I decided to finally start a local Full Moon Circle, launch my new signature program, More Energy Mama, and find new ways to play, dance and move my body. This was no crazy coincidence.
So where do I stand now? I dropped back onto Instagram to quickly promote the Full Moon Circle (it filled up in just one week!) and haven't been on since. I have really enjoyed this break, and need to find a better way to manage the social media thing without getting sucked into scrolling and non-enoughness. Got tips? I'd love to hear them!